Finding Myself

So there has been this thought in the back of my mind for the past few years or so.  And over the past month or so, well basically since school has started, I have become increasingly intoxicatedwith the idea that pursuing the career path of a University professor might actually be my calling in life.  For some odd reason, perhaps because I am on the verge of graduating, this idea becomes stronger and stronger by the day.  It is now coming to the point where I am no longer able to dismiss it from my mind.  Everyday, when I walk down the halls of my campus, I get this rush, this feeling inside of me that tells me that this is the place for me.  Every time I encounter a passionate professor, every time I study late night at the library, every time I encounter anything to do with student life, I become increasingly intoxicated.  It has come to the point where I need to address this feeling and just go with it. 

The persuit of knowledge, the exchange of ideas is something that I have always got a high from.  Just the fact that the world in which we live in can be changed through a simple idea rocks my world.  When I learn about a new theory or a new idea, I get so excited that I need to sit there and talk to someone about it.  I get this urge to share these ideas and try and get people to open their eyes and open their minds.  I am not sure how it is supposed to feel, but if this is how a calling in life feels, than this very well might be it. 

I came one step closer to coming to a realization that academia is my calling.  I was with a friend last night and both he and I were sitting in this amazingly designed building late at night.  He was studying for an exam and I was researching a topic for an essay.  I decided to take a break.  After surfing the net looking up useless things, I came across what I consider to one of the hidden jewels on the Internet, ted.com

Ted.com is a website that is dedicated to spreading ideas.  In fact the slogan of the site is actually, “Ideas worth spreading.”  The site essentially comprises of great thinkers of our world who are asked to speak for 18 minutes on a topic or subject on which they specialize in.  They have different categories and themes that people speak on.  Topics such as politics, sociology, psychology, science and every other discipline are discussed in front of an appreciative audience. 

Ted.com may be my new drug.  And it may be the very thing that inspires me to persue a masters and eventually a PhD. 

I sat there last night, watching some of these lectures and I was amazed at how passionate some of these people are about the fields that they study and how articulate they are in presenting these ideas to other people.  It was literally magical. 

I watched a lecture by Carolyn Porco who is a planetary scientist.  She was speaking on Saturn and she actually said that she was getting goosebumps just talking about it.  It almost drove me to tears.  Her presentation in particular in front of TED got me thinking that night…I could literally be her.  I could be the one that spreads my ideas and gets shivers down my spine and goosebumps when I eventually get to share these ideas.

I don’t want to be one of those people that looks back at his life and regrets not at least flirting with such a strong desire to see if it was actually possible.  And I know in the back of my mind that it could very well be possible.  I mean, there really isn’t any reason for it not to happen.  It might not be as prestigious as a career in Law but I honestly believe that if I choose the path of a professorship that I could actually live a life of happiness and fulfillment. 

It’s going to be an interesting year folks, that is for sure. 

On a side note, please, PLEASE visit this site.  I am sure a lot of you people will enjoy it.  It’s been around for two years or so and I am so surprised that I didn’t come across this before.  It is anything but a waste of time.

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  1. jian5
    October 22, 2008 at 8:06 pm

    You may not make skyscrapers, or find the cure for cancer, or defend the oppressed in court, but if you’re a teacher, you’ll create engineers, doctors, and lawyers to these for you.

    So go, follow your dreams. Take care!

  2. October 22, 2008 at 8:25 pm

    Thank you my friend.

  3. darren
    October 22, 2008 at 8:26 pm

    do you mind me asking what you’re majoring in?

  4. October 23, 2008 at 12:08 am

    I am majoring in Political Science.

  5. Dennis
    October 31, 2008 at 2:08 am

    I found your blog by trolling around the internet. I lament wasting my life from age 18 to about 30. Aimlessly going from job to job with no direction in life. By the time I started college at age 32, it was already to late for me. I was able to obtain a two year associates degree from a local community college, but I had to end it there. I always wanted to go back to school and get a higher degree, possibly even a doctorate. I spend a lot of time thinking about what could have been for me if I only had more drive in my life at an earlier age. Now, at age 40, married with 4 children, I have come to the realization that I will never be able to go back to college, and that has been a hard pill for me to swallow. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy with my family and would not trade them for anything, but there is always a part of me that fells like I could have been something more than I am (a prison guard). I think you know what I mean here…

    Anyway, the point that I am trying to convey to you is to seize the opportunity to do what you have a passion for in life (mine was history). Otherwise, you could spend a lifetime regretting that decision. I hope this helps you some. Best of luck to you!

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