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I Hate This…

November 18, 2007 Leave a comment

This like happens to me every semester. Just when paper time is around the corner, I crash.  As of right now, I have two papers due, one of which was due Friday and the other one which is due on Monday.  I have all the books lying here on my bedroom floor but yet, here I am sitting here, not even making an effort to get myself writing.  And yet, here I am typing away on my blog.  For the last like three to four hours, I have sat here and surfed youtube and watched quite possibly every Freaks and Geeks clip as well as every Undeclared clip on the site.  Every now and then, between my periods of rationality, this thought of my crappy GPA comes to mind and I get this sinking feeling in my stomach and my legs get numb.  And to get rid of this feeling, I try and do something else…like watch another Undeclared episode, just to relieve my stress.  This weekend hasn’t helped at all.  I’ve had LSAT class all day Friday and Saturday and I have it Sunday as well.  That still isn’t an excuse considering I have had all of last week, up until Wednesday off for the long weekend.  I don’t know why I do this.   This happens every Goddamn semester.  I am at this point where I just hate papers now with such a passion.  I don’t want to write papers for which I have to be graded for the littlest things anymore.  Can you believe, I will get docked a third of a letter grade, just because I didn’t footnote write? Like bloody come on.  This isn’t good for my GPA, this isn’t good for grad school or law school either.  I really hate times like this.  Its times like this where I see my entire future collapse in front of me.  Like literally…I can see my entire life end right now.  And you know what the funny thing is? I never ever learn my lesson. I go through this hell every semester.  And I just never learn.  I wish I knew why I do this.  And to be honest, I really don’t know.  The only thing I can attribute this to is the lack of motivation and drive….which is so sad because I could be graduating like a year from now.  Why did life have to be so bloody hard? I can slowly see myself becoming a failure and I have nobody blame but myself.

Unprodictive Long Weekend

November 12, 2007 Leave a comment

Well its the long weekend and once again my study schedule isn’t going as planned.  Its Sunday today and I have yet to begin work on my papers.  This is not a good thing because I know I going to deeply regret wasting this time come due dates.  But honestly, I am so exhausted these days its not even funny.  Sometimes I wish I could have some time where I don’t have to worry about work or school or deadlines…sometimes I wish I could just be.  People who make fun of a poli degree don’t realize that degrees like these mentally drain you and that has a toll on your body.  But whatever…they’re just haters.  Thank God I have Monday and Tuesday off from school.  Ive been worrying about doing some work these last two days. I think I am just going to literally do nothing tomorrow and give it my all starting on Tuesday.  We’ll see how well that goes. 

I am really tempted to talk about a dear friend of mine and her plight but I am hesitant to do so, so I guess won’t.  Ive been thinking a lot about her and I don’t know if that is necessarily a good thing.  Like literally this entire week, she’s been on my mind.

Speaking of girls, I think I have found the girl of my dreams.  She’s in the music video posted below.  She is literally the type of girl that I lay in bed thinking about night after night.  The smile….the long black hair…that hint of shyness on her face…perfection! Im going to go to bed now and hope she appears in my dreams tonight.

What a busy week!

It has been a horribley busy week.  Today is the first time that I have actually sat home and did nothing.  A friend of mine was moving from an appartment to a house just down the street.  So we were all busy helping her and her roommate move.  This sounds corny but it was probably one of the funnest things that I have done in a while.  All our cars were filled with boxes, one car had like three things tied up to the roof…it was just a really fun experience.  I forgot how fun moving really is, especially when your doing with your friends and not your parents.  So yea, moving took about two or three days.  And in the process I made a new friend as well.  So that was pretty cool.

Lets see what else….this was all going on in the midst of my studying for the LSAT…which is not going well at all.  I think I’d rather talk about that in another post on another day.  Yesterday, they had a little housewarmig party for everyone who helped move + some of New Guy’s friends.  They were pretty cool and chillax.  So yea, its been fun. 

So I found out my contract for my cell ended a few days ago.  So I am actively in search of a new phone and a new plan.  I was fully prepared to buy a Sony Ericsson with a Fido plan but a friend of mine told me to hold off and talk to all the phone companies and see what I can milk out of them in terms of a plan and contract.  I really suck at negotiating and all that so hopefully I’ll get something good out of all of this.  I’d figure I’d go for a PDA because of all my extra carricular stuff going on. But these things are just so damn expensive.  We’ll see.  Im looking into this HTC Touch phone that just recently came out.  Ive read good reviews about and after reading them, Im really tempted to buy it.  A friend of mine has it so hopefully he’ll have time to come over today and show it to me.  Shopping for this kind of stuff is such a pain.  Partly because I am so indecissive as to what I really want.  None of these phones or plans are ever perfect.  And if they are, they are way too expensive.  Its just so frustrating.  We’ll see. Hopefully I can get the best bang for my buck. 

The Night Of A Thousand Hours

October 28, 2007 1 comment

In 25 hours I will be in class writing a midterm for my Politics of Advanced Industrial States class. I have so much to do its not even funny. As of right now, I have something like 15 academic journal articles to read by the end of tonight.  This is going to be hell.  I was supposed to get on campus at like 1o but I slept in and woke up at 9.  THEN I got stuck in traffic for like an hour.  I’ll probably be here til 11pm.  Its going to be one long day.  I just have remind myself that is just one more day where I have to toil over my books.  After that all I have to worry about is my LSAT prep and the essays that I have to begin working on.  That won’t be so bad because I can spread those out and pace myself.  So yea….ONE MORE DAY!!!

Time to kick the books.

Unproductive Days and University Life

Well its been a horrid week this week.  I had an assignment due on Tuesday.  After I handed that in, I decided to take a break for the day.  I was pretty burnt out so I figured it would be good.  What really ended up happening is a whole lot of nothing.  I didn’t go to class on Wednesday and I didn’t go to class on Thursday.  In fact, I didn’t come to school on Thursday. This is despite the fact that I have a midterm this coming Monday.  Now I am stuck in the Library Tower on a Friday night just beginning to study for this exam.  And let me tell you, there is A LOT to study.  The fact that my brother showed up home with a brand new Wii console didn’t help the situation either. 

 Some other thoughts: The more I think about it, the more it seems like I am in fact living the typical life that a university student lives.  Life revolves around school.  It involves being poor to the point where sometimes I have to second guess whether I can afford to buy lunch.  It involves spending long nights in the library (like today) and always being tired.  It involves much intellectual activity, exchanging of ideas and conjuring up great theories that could make the world a better place and then forgetting about them a few days later. 

The biggest thing, however, I think is the the friends.  I’ll focus on one group of my friends in particular for this entry.  This group of friends is centred around one girl.  If it wasn’t for her, I would not know the rest of them.  And anytime we congregate, it is at her place.  Anything and anything creative we want to do, we do together.  If we want to cook, we cook together, if we want to go skating, we skate together…etc.  We are all students going to either University or polytech.  Its just something about this group of people that makes me thankful that I know them.  They are the group that will ultimately dictate my university life.  Its just nice to have people like that around.  Even if we do nothing, we do nothing together.  This may sound corny, but our lives together resemble a lot like the college kids you see on TV.  It may not be as elaborate (going on trips every second week and so on) but I am pretty sure that in my realm, that’s as close as its going to get.  Lately, we have this thing where we all gather at her place on Thursday nights and we all sit on the sofa and watch ER, Grey’s Anatomy, Ugly Betty and The Office.  Especially during these stressful times, I live for those Thursday nights.  Student life is a good life.

I don’t know why but there’s an increased security presence in the Library tonight.  I’ve seen more security guards tonight in the Library than I have ever….literally. I wonder whats going on? 

Now, back to studying the diversity of electoral systems.

I Think I Am Going Crazy

I just took a small nap right now and I dreamt that I was asking some prof if he could write me a reference letter.  Unforunately, I woke up before he could write one up for me.  I think I am going mad.

Despite my nap, I am still tired.  I so don’t want to study today. I know I should since I have a midterm coming up on Monday but Im just too burnt out from this past week. 

LSAT In My Dream

October 22, 2007 3 comments

For the past weekend, Friday, Saturday and Sunday, I have been thinking about nothing but the LSAT.  My journey towards law school pretty much started on Friday. Before that, the LSAT was in the back of my mind but hardly.  This morning I got a taste of what its going to be like for the next few months.  I dreamt of taking the LSAT.  And when I woke up, I woke up all stressed out rather than relaxed and refreshed.  Life is going to be complete hell…

I had to sleep in today and miss class. I haven’t slept properly since last week.  I could have slept more but I have to meet with my prof at 12.30.  Get this: I email her asking what her office hours are and she emails me back saying that her office hours today are from 12.30-1.00.  Who the hell has a half an hour office hour?! Hopefully I’ll get there before the other students.

Time to get ready. Hopefully I’ll see Hot LSAT Class Girl today.
*Fingers crossed*